“Red One. Over And Out”

Somewhere deep down I know it’s wrong but I can’t help myself. I place the blame wholly on The Youngest. It were she who brought them to my attention, it were she who made me watch over and over and over and over and over until I was hooked.

I’m late to the party though. Nothing new there, I’ve not seen Game of Thrones. Always the last on the train. Better late than never though huh? Perhaps not this time.

“Hello, my name is Tina and I’m a One Direction fan”

It all started when The Youngest discovered James Cordon’s carpool karaoke. I’ve lost count of how many times we’ve watched the One Direction one, it’s somewhere between three and a million. We’ve seen it enough for James to now be affectionately known as “the fat one from One Direction” she’ll be devastated when she learns the truth. Then, after carpool karaoke, came the music videos, hours of the blooming things. Thanks YouTube. I now understand how it’s possible to brainwash folk. The worst of it is that The Youngest is long over it. I’m not.

My favourite is Drag Me Down but the video really annoys me. Those jammy little buggers get to fiddle with Nasa’s magic because what? They can sing a bit. I can’t decide if I want to give one of them a squeeze or whether I just want to be one of them? Any one, I’m not fussy. I’d love to sit in a rocket.

Sadly I can’t be in One Direction, I’m a 45 yr old woman for starters but, more importantly, they’ve gone their separate ways. Split up now that I have a wee girl to use as my reason for going.

“Me, a fan? Hell no, I’m just here for the kid, she loves Harry”

Who doesn’t love Harry? No? Just me? Hmm, that’s odd. Moving on.

If I were to have my time over I would do my utmost to be in One Direction but only after I’d finished my stint with the Red Arrows.